And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize