I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
