Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
