she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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