So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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