well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
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