Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
