I should be sponsored by Trojan
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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