So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
