It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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