So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
