LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
