Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
It's blow job season.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem