Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
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I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
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Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?