Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Randomize
