eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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