i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Fuck appropriateness.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
