Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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