They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
