ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
