Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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