Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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