I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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