she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Randomize
