i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
