he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
