Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize