Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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