party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
