we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
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