so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
