She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize