We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize