Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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