I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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