Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize