My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
