I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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