I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
