butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize