She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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