it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
