Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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