Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
