dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
