She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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