there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
