I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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