if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
