im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
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