It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
She told me I should be a condom model.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
